#282 Stairway Back Home
Sep05
on September 5, 2024
at 2:00 am
One of these days, someone will open the fridge fast enough to see what it looks like when it’s closed. But until that happens, it’ll have to be another wonder of the world next to the Great Pyramids and that Subway that’s somehow still open.
Read on Webtoons!
Subway is great, how dare you.
Subway: it that the shop that makes sandwiches using tuna that’s not tuna, cheese that’s not cheese, on a roll-like-object that cannot, by law, be called, “bread?”
I knew Subway was full of shit when they started claiming their sandwiches were “health food,” and that you could, “loose weight,” by eating them, and then had to put a tiny disclaimer on that you had to pick the item on the menu with the smallest amount of calories, could not have cheese, and had to eat it DRY, without mayo or vinaigrette, or anything else that would make it possible to choke back one of their, “sandwiches,” with of course either a diet soda or cup of water, to drink and naturally NO chips… all of which they serve normally, and a LOT of people buy. It was all lies and hype from the beginning and nothing since has even suggested elsewise.
That said, my favorite Subway diet-destroyer is an Italian BMT on sourdough or white bread, with extra meat and extra cheese, and either the teriyaki onion chicken sandwich dressing if they have it, or else the oil and vinegar, along with seasonings from those metal shakers like oregano, and then I get the jalapeño chips and a big ol’ COKE… because I’m a fatty, and I don’t care.
But let’s not lie to ourselves and pretend that shit’s GOOD for you, okay?!?
…
There’s a switch that the door presses whenever it’s closed that turns off the light. This isn’t a mystery.
yeah but how do you know it works
You get into the fridge and close it, obviously
So you don’t win friends with salad, but you can use it to enter the afterlife. Just don’t bring the salad with you into the afterlife, because it won’t win you any friends and then you’ll be stuck with passive ill-wishers for an eternity.
Now that question was just unfair
Also welcome back Cuddlep00p